Coming out as gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender or queer can be one of the scariest events in a person’s life. Real or perceived rejection from family or friends is incredibly painful, and the person may be struggling with complicated feelings.
When working through issues of sexual orientation or gender identity, a therapist can be a safe, helpful source of support.
Dr. Gene Devers provides LGBT counseling in Northeast Philadelphia. Drawing on many years of experience, he works with people from all walks of life, providing individualized therapy in a warm, compassionate atmosphere.
Coming Out: Working Through the Process with a Therapist
For some, coming out is sudden and dramatic. Others choose to come out only in certain parts of their lives (to friends, for example) while choosing not to disclose in other areas. Others come out slowly, over a period of months or years. In summary, the process is different for everyone.
Nevertheless, some difficulties are common to the experience of coming out. A therapist can provide help and support with:
1. Dismantling shame. Unfortunately, there is a long history of prejudice against the LGBTQ community, and hateful attitudes remain at large in many parts of the country. It makes sense that someone experiencing same-sex attraction might internalize a sense of shame, even if they expect their friends and family will be supportive. Getting to the root of shame—and dismantling it—can be something to work through with a therapist.
2. Unraveling yourself from others’ expectations. For many, an extremely difficult part of coming out is feeling they will fail to live up to expectations—of family, church, community, or elsewhere. Sometimes, a person knows for certain those close to them will react with anger, betrayal, or total rejection. A therapist can help sort through what you feel others expect of you, and in some cases, cope with defying expectations in favor of coming out.
3. Grappling with labels. “Gay,” “lesbian,” bisexual,” “transgender” and “queer” can be helpful labels, but in reality, everyone is different and some may feel like none of the terms apply. A therapist’s office is a safe place to explore one’s unique gender identity and sexual orientation, without judgment and guided by helpful questions.
4. Sharing with others. How and when to share one’s sexual orientation are challenging questions for many. If the prospect of sharing with others is terrifying, talking through your feelings with a therapist can be invaluable. Some members of the LGBT community spend years or even decades keeping their orientation a secret, and in such cases, sharing with a compassionate professional may ease the process of coming out.
Contact Philly Family Life for LGBT Counseling in Northeast Philadelphia
If you’re in need of an LGBT counselor in Northeast Philadelphia, Dr. Gene Devers of Philly Family Life Counseling is here to offer support. Whether you’re coming out yourself, or you’re coping with a loved one coming out, he can provide a wealth of expertise and experience in an understanding, compassionate atmosphere.
Call 215/677-3810 now and schedule your initial appointment. Let’s work toward acceptance together.
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